Vampires, Fairies and Idiots, Oh My!
by Love Muffin Of Doom
Summary: She only went to Fangtasia to pick up her drunk friend. In the process she managed to piss off Longshadow, get between Eric and his meal and run into Sookie after nine years. Now her life is upside down and really, nothing should surprise her anymore!
1. Chapter 1

**Disclaimer: I don't own anything you can recognize! =D**

**I know, I should be working on my other story, but I couldn't help myself, the inspiration struck and I was powerless to stop it! Oh well, I hope you guys enjoy this!**

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><p>"Fan – Fun – Free – Fang.. Ah, Fangtasia that's right!"<p>

A lone girl appeared to be talking to herself atop a motorbike as she drove through the streets looking furtively at ever shop on the road before stopping at a black and red themed night club named 'Fangtasia'.

Now I know what you're probably expecting; A tall, beautiful, mysterious girl getting off a large, powerful, sleek, black motorbike before gliding into the vampire club before her, right? No.

Instead a small girl hopped off a tiny, orange, disgrace of a motorcycle (It was more like a motor-scooter than anything AND it had one of those dorky side-cars attached) tripped over her converse's shoelaces after disembarking and, after pulling off a pink Hello Kitty helmet, shuffled up to the entrance of the graceful looking night club.

Upon reaching the entrance of the club the smallish girl was accosted by a taller, incredibly stunning vampire woman, she appeared to be the bouncer of this bar.

"Wow," The girl blurted out the first thing that came to her mind. "You're so beautiful!"

"Indeed," Said beautiful woman let out a fanged smile before looking the human girl up and down, noting her big silver-grey eyes and tousled rusty-blond hair. "However, we don't serve minors here."

"Oh, right! Well, I'm not a minor; see!" The 'human minor' dug around in the pockets of her varsity jacket before procuring an ID card and handing it to the brunette woman.

"Well, Syn Purkiss," After scanning the contents of the card the vampire handed the human girl back her ID. "You're barely old enough; you have a good time in Fangtasia." She purred standing aside as to let Syn into the club.

"You have a good night too." Syn replied politely as she continued to shuffle inside the vampire club leaving the vampiress outside shaking her head in amusement.

"That kid's going to get eaten alive in there." The brunette bouncer muttered bemusedly under her breath as she watched the ginger-blond haired human stumble into the lair of the beasts.

XxoxX

"Gosh! Where the hell is Lily?" Syn whined, shoving her hands into black skinny jean pockets as she wandered around the club looking for her friend Lily. She dodged drunken randoms gyrating about in nothing more than stickers to cover the necessities and vampires who were way too interested in the naked females to notice a tiny, scruffy human. "She promised she would be ready to go by down!" The small, human girl sighed as she sulked down to the bar and ungracefully dropped onto a bar stool.

"What'll you have?" A low husky voice sounded from behind the bar counter.

Syn glanced up to see a vampire with long black hair casually shaking a tumbler; she supposed he must be the bartender.

"Ah, I'll just have some water please!" the rusty haired girl smiled at the bartender who promptly scowled when he heard her choice of drink for the night.

"It's just," She attempted to explain herself. "I'm the designated driver for tonight, so I really can't be drinking."

The black-haired bartender just raised an eyebrow, and Syn couldn't help but get the impression that he didn't really care. "I'll get you your water." He growled before grouching off.

It was hard to resist the urge to stick her tongue out at him, but Syn managed by reminding herself that she simply had to act more grown up now, especially since she was on her own. And also, he was a vampire - he could easily rip out her tongue if he was in a bad mood and found her gesture insulting.

Curiously looking around the night club, Syn hoped she would see a familiar face, she felt hopelessly out of place in the club after all, especially being dressed as she was with her rusty-blond hair in mass disarray.

Looking past the scantily clad vampire dancers up on the table moving faster than she could follow and looking around the human's pressing desperately up against anything moving, Syn did a double take as she recognized the black hair that belonged to her friend Lily.

Before she could take off after her friend her glass of water was plopped down on the counter and a large hand shoved itself into her immediate line of vision.

"That'll be five bucks."

Snapping her head around to face the grouchy-faced bartender Syn couldn't help herself from letting out an incredulous "Sorry, what?"

"Your water." The long haired vampire gestured to the glass. "It costs five bucks."

"B-But" Syn stuttered, slightly shocked at the overpriced water. "It's just water!" She protested.

Fangs were flashed at the girl who flinched at the sight of them. "You got a problem with that?" He growled threateningly.

"Nope," Rusty-blond hair waved back and forth following the violent shaking of Syn's head. "Here you go." Fishing through her pockets the girl procured a crumbled five dollar bill and placed it gently in the bartender's hand; Syn had never seen a five dollar bill disappear so fast in her life.

Grabbing the water in one hand Syn took a sip and slipped off the tall bar stool, trying to find her friend in the crowd again.

It wasn't that hard, her friend appeared to be still kneeling on the floor. "Oh Gods Lily!" Syn muttered to herself under her breath. "You weren't supposed to get that drunk!"

She pushed and wiggled her way through the mass of people occupying the club until she got to her friend who appeared to be mumbling something drunkenly under her breath.

Completely ignoring her surroundings Syn reached down and grabbed her pretty, black-haired friend by her shoulder and attempted to haul her up onto her feet.

"Oh come on Lily!" Syn begged while tugging on Lily's arm. "We gotta go!"

"I dun't wanna!" A drunken whine came from the kneeling girl before unfocused, dazed brown eyes met Syn's silver ones. "I wanna get eaten!" Lily proclaimed drunkenly. "I wanna fuck a vampire!"

Syn's formerly wide eyes narrowed threateningly. "Well you're not going to, especially not tonight!" with a strength that belied her tiny appearance, the rusty haired girl jerked her bigger friend to her feet and quickly wrapped an arm around her waist to support her stumbling friend.

"Why not?" The black-haired Lily whined leaning heavily on Syn who tried to supress a grimace while trying to stay upright and support her friend.

"Because!" Syn growled trying to drag her friend away. "I do not want to have to come back here and pick you up, I most certainly am not waiting for you to get done and if the worst happens I don't want to feel responsible." Lily let out a high pitched giggle and Syn pouted in exasperation. "Also if you don't come back I'll have nowhere to stay, so we're going home!" The sombre one of the pair finished in a hushed voice.

"But I was in the middle of offering myself to him!" the tall girl protested again straining against Syn's hold in order to get to whomever it was she was 'offering' herself to.

Syn 'tched' in annoyance before her curiosity got the better of her and she turned to look at the vampire that her friend had just been worshiping.

Large feet were covered with black boots and as her eyes travelled up the body of the vampire – past the black pants and leather jacket she realized that the vampire had been staring right at her with icy blue eyes.

Unable to help herself, Syn jerked back in surprise, silver eyes widening and her grip on Lily loosening.

"I hope," The blue eyed vampire spoke lowly brushing long blond hair away from his face, "That the only reason you are taking my meal prospect away is to offer yourself in her stead."

"Um," Syn started intelligently stumbling when Lily suddenly lurched away, that action caused both of the girls to fall on the floor.

The rusty-blond girl couldn't help herself from blushing bright red as she untangled herself from her friend in order to face the vampire that was staring at the mess of the two of them.

"No, I'm getting her home." Syn blurted out without thinking, not even looking at the blond vampire who was now sporting an amused expression. Tripping once again over her friend's prone body, Syn steadied herself, grabbed her black-haired friend and dragged her off without a backwards glance. She didn't notice the way the male's blue eyes followed after her retreating figure for a little longer than necessary. Of course a pretty blond dancer wearing nothing more than a leather bikini crossed the blond vampire's line of sight and by the time he looked back, there was no trace of the tiny girl, or her drunken, black-haired friend.

"Why do we have to leave now!~" The giddy girl let out a whine, struggling in the hold of the rusty-blond girl.

Syn huffed as she tried to guide her friend out from the throngs of writhing humans and vampires, and she promptly decided that it was so much easier to get from one side of the club to another when she didn't have to toe along a smashed friend.

"You better be so happy I love you!" Syn muttered as she finally managed to free the two of them from the dancing crowd. She loved her friend, she really did, but the things she had to put up with!

"I'm tiiiired…" The mumble coming from Lily who seemed to be stumbling more than before alerted Syn to the fact that her friend was going to need to sit down – real soon or else Lily was going to collapse and take her down as well.

"Oh, ok Lily!" Quickly the sombre girl placed Lily on one of the couches and looked towards the bar, where the grumpy, vampire bartender was still working away on mixing drinks. Quickly Syn shot a glance between the bar and her sleepy friend.

"Wake up Lily, ok?" she gently tapped Lily's face in order to keep her awake. "We can't fall asleep just yet, alright? I'm going to go get some water for you, you just wait here for me ok?"

Seeing as she knew she wasn't going to receive much of a response from her friend – other than giggles of course – Syn set off to the bar, hoping that the man there wouldn't be so mad if she asked for another glass of water.

"Um," The rusty-blond girl started hesitantly, trying to catch the long haired bartender's attention.

"What do you want now?" It appeared she had successfully caught his attention.

Syn immediately held out a five dollar bill as a peace offering, "Can I have another glass of water please?"

The five dollar bill was snatched from her hand as before and another glass of water was hastily deposited in front of her. Not wanting to keep her friend waiting, Syn took the water and raced back to LIly. She tried to studiously ignore the voice of the bar-tender mumbling something about 'Stupid cheapskates who don't actually drink'.

Glass of water clutched firmly in her small hand, Syn deftly maneuverer her way back through the crowd of people. But as someone suddenly appeared in front of her the rusty blond stumbled in surprise, but before she could lose both her balance and water and a hand belonging to the same person that had startled her reached out and grabbed her shoulder saving both her and her water.

Looking up at her savior Syn found herself face-to-face with a very pretty, tan, blond woman (obviously human) wearing a white and red print dress.

"You ok?" The woman asked the girl who was still clutching the water tightly to her chest.

"Oh, yea!" Syn assured as she looked the woman up and down, it was weird she could have sworn she had known this woman before, she just couldn't for the life of her figure out where.

"Syn? What the heck are you doin' here?" The woman exclaimed incredulously moving closer to get a better look at the short, rusty blond girl.

Recognition suddenly clicked in small girl's head. "Sookie?"

Suddenly Syn's night just got a whole lot weirder.

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><p><strong>AN: CONFESSION! I have absolutely no idea where I am going with this story, and I have to confess that I have no plot plan whatsoever. But if you like this story please review and tell me if you want me to continue! **

**Everyone loves reviews~**

**~Love and Coffee~**

**Love Muffin (Of Doom)**


	2. Chapter 2

**Disclaimer: I don't own anything you can recognize! =D**

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><p>"What are you doing in a vampire bar of all places Syn?" Sookie questioned the now startled silver eyed girl. "I mean, are you even old enough?"<p>

Syn decided not to take offense at Sookie's words, a decision that made her feel quite mature and proud of herself, but she was used to being asked that anyway. "I'm perfectly legal now!" The small girl replied happily. "How've you been by the way? I haven't seen you since I was little!"

"It's not like you got any bigger," Sookie quipped back referring to the rusty-blonde's shorter stature, "You used to be a horrible little monster to babysit!"

"And I still am!" Syn proclaimed proudly with a naughty grin on her face.

"So really why are you here?"

"Ya mean Louisiana or Fangtasia?" The shorter girl shot back, cheeky grin still in place.

"Both, I suppose." The perky blond answered slowly.

"Um well, I'm in Louisiana because I needed a change of scenery that wasn't completely strange and I'm currently in Fangtasia, odd name isn't it, to pick up my drunk roommate before she becomes vampire food." Syn explained.

"Where were you before you came back? Your accent definitely isn't American." The two of them slowly made their way towards an empty table but didn't sit down.

"Oh," The rusty-blonde's hair was twirled sheepishly. "I was living in Australia for a few years before."

"That explains it then!" Sookie exclaimed happily.

Silver eyes widened in worry as they found Lily fraternizing with a group of two males and a female.

"Um, I'm so sorry Sookie," Syn apologized, "I've gotta get my roommate home before she gets into any more trouble." With that the small girl grabbed her glass of water and started to hurry off, on a mission to grab her roommate and get her the hell home.

"Come by Bon Temps sometime ok Syn?" Sookie called after the quickly disappearing girl who just managed a sign of consent before diving back into the crowd after her friend.

Sookie watched as the silver eyed girl wormed through the group surrounding the drunken, black haired girl and grabbed the taller beauty before trying to make her drink the water. After that messy affair the rusty – blonde slung her friend's arm around her shoulders before lugging her out of the club like an overly large sack of potatoes.

After the girly duo disappeared out of the club door Sookie decided it was high time to go back to Bill who was most likely getting a little more than worried about her.

XxoxX

"Come on Lily," Syn grunted as she dragged her friend into Fangtasia's parking lot where she had left her little scooter. "Please, work with me here, it'll be so much easier if you would at least try to walk."

The only response the rusty-blonde got from Lily was a high pitched giggle before the bigger girl pitched all her weight onto the tiny girl carrying her making Syn stagger dangerously.

"Care for some help?" A seductive voice purred directly behind Syn making her jump in surprise and nearly loose hold of her drunk friend who tilted dangerously towards the ground before Syn could steady her.

"Now, now no need to be so startled," The voice that Syn now identified as Pam spoke. "I would say 'I don't bite' but," The vampiress flashed a fang-full smile. "That would be a painfully obvious lie."

Before Syn could think up a proper and appropriate response a weight, Lily's weight to be exact, was lifted from her shoulders and onto Pam's.

"So why are you so keen on taking your little friend from Fangtasia when it is clear she does not want to leave?" Pam questioned as she strode into the parking lot, Syn – who was not quite sure what was happening – trailed behind her.

Yet again, before the small girl even realized the beautiful vampiress had asked her a question, and way before she could formulate an answer a snarling Pam was up in her face.

"It couldn't possibly be because you don't like vampires, is it?" The tall vampire growled threateningly.

Now that question Syn had a chance to actually register. "Of course I like vampires; I have absolutely nothing against them!" Syn defended herself, silver eyes flashing in indignation.

"Then why, seeing as how you have 'absolutely nothing against us', are you so adamant on taking your friend away from the vampire club?"

"There are actually several reasons," Syn explained as she continued following the female deeper into the parking lot, not even caring that the vampiress was only half listening. "First of all; when she was still somewhat sober, she called me and asked if I could come pick her up. Secondly; Lily has work painfully early tomorrow, and she can't afford to miss it." The rusty-blonde girl valiantly ignored the eye roll Pam sent her way and continued on. "And lastly; Lily is terribly anemic, she was born with the disease by the way, so having a vampire feeding off of her could be disastrous."

They finally reached the little orange motor bike belong to Syn and after unloading the black haired girl, Pam turned to Syn.

"I admit I wasn't even listening to half of what you were saying, frankly I don't care for excuses, and what was coming out of your mouth seemed an awful lot like excuses to me." Syn suddenly found her chin in the grasp of the vampiress and her face was forced up so that the tall woman could look straight into her face. Pam leaned down closer and put her lips right next to the small girl's pierced ears. "But do come again sometime, I have a feeling you'll be quite amusing if you keep your mouth shut."

With that the female vampire promptly let go of Syn's chin, turned around and gracefully walked back up to the club.

"Thank you?" the rusty-blonde girl shouted up after the exiting vampire, still not quite sure what had just occurred.

Without further ado Syn turned to her friend who was propped up on the side of her motor cycle.

"Alrighty then," The short girl grabbed the taller girl and heaved her over to the little side seat attached to the orange motorcycle. "I doubt you'll actually be able to stay on the back of me if I let you sit on the back of the Smex-mobile." Syn spoke to her friend as she lovingly patted the back of her motorbike dubbed 'Smex-mobile', not really caring that Lily was way too far gone to actually here what her friend was saying. "So you'll have to ride in the side car on the way home."

Gritting her teeth and displaying what Syn thought was great strength, the small girl heaved Lily into the side car and was promptly reduced to a heaving mess after all that physical exertion.

Lily just giggled in response to the huffing mess that was Syn lying on the floor.

XxoxX

_Fire and blood; that was the only thing registering in the injured girl's broken mind. _

_The small girl's shattered body lay in a pool of blood in the middle of the mayhem. Soft whimper's escaped her mouth as convulsions racked her small body. Her body shook with pain, but the girl had no strength to scream, instead small whimpers escaped from the torn, bloodied barrier of her lips. _

_In the midst of her fear and pain a strangely calm thought pierced her conscience, 'I'm going to die.' _

_It was true, the girl knew that, along with what remained of her blood she could feel the last bits of her conscience drain away, and she knew that if she closed her eyes now, they would never open again. _

_Just as the bloodied girl decided to close her eyes and surrender to the black nothingness that was calling her name she heard footsteps over the sound of blood roaring in her brain. _

_Forcing herself back into wakefulness, the small girl tried desperately to find out where the footsteps were coming from, trying to move her head was futile so to her dismay she couldn't see anything that wasn't in her direct line of sight, and even then her vision was blurred. _

_ After what felt like years of waiting and struggling to stay awake and alive two feet came into her sight. There was a pair of legs attached to those feet. Those legs crouched down and brought a person down with them, to her level. The person was, in fact a male with short dark hair and a youthful face._

_ Strange amber eyes met the girl's silver ones, despite the situation she was in her eyes were strangely tearless. The broken girl felt herself being lifted and her head was placed on the strange boys lap. Long fingers ran through her previously rusty – blond hair that was now dyed crimson and plastered together due to the abundance of blood not inside her body. _

_ She stared at the boy silently, not doing anything, not begging him to save her, just looking and he, in turn looked back down at her. _

_ "You're dying." He said simply, in a voice that showed no emotion._

_ Again, the tiny girl already knew that, but she was too weak to say anything. Although she was surprised and slightly insulted when the boy let out a laugh, it was probably because of the 'ya think?' look the girl had in her eyes when he told dying girl her imminent fate._

_ A wave of pain washed over her small body and a strangled gasp was wrenched from her lips, her quickly dulling, silver eyes began to roll up into her head. With the last of her strength the dying girl grasped onto the arm of the boy who was holding her. She knew this was it; fear clenched a hold of her and her previously dry eyes filled up with tears. _

_ "But death will not take you tonight." Her hearing faintly managed to pick up the voice coming from above her, but in her pain – addled mind she was unable to comprehend the meaning of the words spoken by the man holding her. _

_ However she was able to comprehend when her mouth was being filled with an odd-tasting thick liquid. Having nothing else to do, her only instinct was to spit out the foreign substance in her mouth. She panicked as she found that the boy holding her was holding her mouth closed in an iron grip that she doubted she could break even if she was at her full strength._

_ 'Shhh, my blood will help you heal, drink it if you want to live." A soothing but firm voice came from the boy holding her._

_ Repulsed by the thought of drinking blood, but also desperately wanting to live the desperate girl swallowed everything that was in her mouth, there was also the fact that her jaw was being held captive that helped her swallow the blood. _

_ Once the boy holding her realized she had swallowed everything that was in her mouth, he removed his hand from around her jaw, only to shove his bleeding wrist into her mouth. _

_ Hesitantly the wounded girl sucked on his wrist, drawing the blood out of him and into her mouth and even more hesitantly, she swallowed it. She hated the fact that she was drinking blood, but she wanted to live more than anything and so she drank more and more of the boy's blood that was offered to her. _

_ Time blurred for the slowly healing girl and eventually she felt the wrist being taken away from her. _

_ The boy lifted her up in his arms and started walking away from the grizzly scene that the girl had being lying in the middle of. She was not in immediate danger of dying, but she could still do nothing but flop helplessly in his arms as her 'saviour' carried her. _

_ Her sight was blurred and she was completely unaware of her surrounding, but the slowly healing girl could tell that the boy had put her down somewhere grassy and soft. _

_ Content that the tiny girl would heal, the boy made to leave, but was stopped when an impossibly small hand grasped his ankle. He looked down to see the young girl staring up at him with big, silver eyes filled with tears._

_ "Please don't leave me all alone." She spoke slowly and weakly but did not let go of the boy ankle. "Please," she begged softly, "I'm so scared!" tears slowly dripped from her eyes, but she made no sound to suggest that she was crying. _

_ The boy's amber eyes softened as her looked down at the helpless girl, never before had a human begged him to stay with them, and never before had a human looked to him as a source of comfort. _

_ But despite his instincts he sat down next to the silently crying girl gingerly, and despite his age he found himself at a loss at what to do. _

_ The girl struggled to get a hold of her limbs, and although the man's first reaction was to stop her from moving he was curious as to what she was attempting to do. _

_ He was startled and more than a little surprised when she flopped onto him suddenly. The boy stiffened, unused to this kind of physical contact from a human. His face morphed into one of surprise as he saw her shivering and realized she was cold. His face turned into one of pity as he knew he couldn't help the small human, he was colder than she was._

_ Slowly and painstakingly the human girl wormed her way into his arms before letting herself relax, the movement had drained her of any energy she had left anyway. The male just stared at the strange, human girl now slowly recovering in his lap before decided that he would oblige her. _

_ He knew it would take her a while to recover, despite how powerful his blood was she was almost beyond his help. _

_ "What is your name?" The girl startled the male by speaking to him, her voice was faint and she clearly needed more time to recover, but she was well enough that she was conscience, even though she probably could not move yet. _

_ "My name is Godric," The boy answered her, but he wasn't expecting the small giggle that occurred right after his response. He looked down at the girl questioningly, wondering if she had gone mad. "Why do you laugh?" _

_ "Godric is a funny name." She whispered weakly in response._

_ "Well then, what is your name little one?" He was expecting a very mundane, human name._

_ The rusty-blonde haired girl cast her silver eyes up towards the man holding her. "Syn." _

_ Godric gently lifted a hand and placed it on the Syn's bloodied head. "Syn is an unusual name as well." _

_ The small human girl did not respond to his jab, but he looked down just in time to see her stick her pink tongue out at him in the form of a mild, human insult that he never quite understood. _

_ "Syn," Godric spoke again, rolling the girl's name around on his tongue. "If I recall she was the Norse Goddess of truth and watchfulness." He informed the small girl curled up against him. _

_ She looked at him curiously, but no longer had the strength to reply to him. _

_ After a little while of sitting in silence, Syn gather up enough strength to speak again. "Why did you help me?" She asked in a whisper. _

_ "I do not rightly know," Godric answer honestly. "I somehow thought it unfair for you to be left to die in that manner." _

_ "Thank you though, for helping me." Syn's soft voice broke the silence that followed Godric's answer. "I promise that when you're in trouble, I'll come help you." _

_ Godric laughed at the absurdity of this little human female but looking down at her honest face he decided to humour her. "I'll hold you to your promise then." _

Syn woke up with a startled gasp and quickly put her hand to her head. She hadn't had that dream in ages!

Two small feet slowly slid out from under the bed covers and landed on the wooden floor of her small house. Her feet dragged Syn down the old wood step and into the kitchen, where her hand apparently had a mind of their own and got her a glass of water.

"I wonder why I still dream about him." The half-asleep girl wondered to herself. If it's because of the effect his vampire blood had on me, I would have thought it would have worn off by now.

Yes, Syn had realized Godric was a vampire, despite what other people may think, she wasn't all that much of a dumb blonde.

After finishing her cup of water she ran her hands though her messy rusty-blonde hair and walked back up the stairs.

"I wonder if I'll ever get to see him again." Syn spoke aloud, "I reckon it would be kind of awkward though." She trailed off not really caring that her half-asleep mumbling made little sense.

Before going back to bed she opened up Lily's room to check on her. The black haired girl appeared to be sleeping just fine so Syn stagged back to her bed hoping she would be able to go back to sleep, after she woke herself up.

Apparently she had no sleeping problems whatsoever, and as soon as her head hit the pillow she was fast asleep.

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><p><strong>AN: Ok guys I hope you all like this next chapter! Please let me know if you think any of the characters were OOC and please also let me know if Syn is a Mary-Sue so I can change things accordingly. =D Thanks to everyone who Review/Favorited/Alerted this story! Remember, your feedback is what keeps this story going! **

**Everyone loves reviews~**

**~Love and Coffee~**

**Love Muffin (Of Doom)**


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